SouthFlorida.com | City Link Magazine

How do you like your Miami Dolphins now, South Florida? When Sports Illustrated picked the team to go to the Super Bowl before the season began, even die-hard fans were skeptical. "Can Daunte Culpepper really make a full recovery?" they asked. "Can Ronnie Brown handle 25 carries a game? Will Chris Chambers finally rival Santana Moss and Terrell Owens to become the predominant receiver in the league? Is the defense too old and the offense too young?"

Well, here we are, Dolfans and anyone else who wants to hop on the bottle-nosed bandwagon. The premonition has become a reality, and the Dolphins will face the Chicago Bears Sunday in Super Bowl XLI. And right in our back yard. How sweet is that?

"So sweet I'm having my middle name legally changed to Häagen-Dazs," defensive tackle Keith Traylor cracked at a recent press conference.

For the past two weeks, the Dolphins have been reveling in the center of a media maelstrom. Last Sunday morning, coach Nick Saban greeted a group of reporters while standing in the lobby of the Westin Diplomat and noted, "Doesn't seem that long ago when y'all kept asking me if I was going to jump ship and coach at Alabama next year, does it? Well, here's your answer: If I go to Alabama it will be in the off-season as a visiting professor to teach a class in how to kick ass in the Super Bowl!"

The usually tight-lipped Saban hasn't shied away from this season's accomplishments, especially his own. Several times this week, he has brought up the Christmas Day game vs. the New York Jets, when the Dolphins were fourth and inches with the game tied in the fourth quarter. The old Saban might have ordered a field goal. The new Saban opted for a pitchout to Ronnie Brown, who connected on a 20-yard pass to Randy McMichael. Two plays later, the team scored an in-your-face touchdown that has left the infamous Jets/Dolphins rivalry on life support.

"Guts, yeah, that's made the difference," former Dolphins linebacker Bob Kuechenberg says. "But I'll also go on record saying this team has more soul than the undefeated 1972 Dolphins. This Dolphins team has so much soul it killed James Brown."

Nothing has been more remarkable than the fact that all three Dolphins quarterbacks have shared equal playing time with the same victorious results. Cleo Lemon, Joey Harrington and Culpepper all finished the regular season with the same quarterback rating: 155.5. This phenomenon provoked Sun-Sentinel sports columnist Dave Hyde to remark, "If you could download the Miami Dolphins quarterbacks to your iPod and set it on shuffle, no matter which one came up, you'd love the tune."

No player has been less-prepared but enjoyed the spotlight more than Lemon. While being mobbed by reporters at a pre-Super Bowl press conference, he was shocked when Indianapolis Colts quarterback Peyton Manning squeezed in and asked for his autograph.

"And I think Manning was only half-kidding," linebacker Zach Thomas recalls. "It was like in Talladega Nights when Dale Earnhardt Jr. asked Ricky Bobby for an autograph. I 'bout fell down laughing."

A giddiness surrounds this team that South Florida historian Paul George says can be compared only to the freewheeling and fun-loving Fort Lauderdale Strikers soccer team of 1978. "Of course, those blokes were doing a heap of coke," George admits. "But the members of this Miami Dolphins team can get high off their own sweat."

"From the moment we shut out Pittsburgh in the first game of the season, it's just been a ride," wide receiver Wes Welker says. "I remember last season when a neighbor saw me in my driveway and said, 'Hey you play for the Dolphins?' I said, 'I sure do.' He just looked me up and down because of my small stature and said in disgust, 'No wonder we lose every game.' "

Now, Welker is the shortest white man ever to be invited to the Pro Bowl and get a date with actress Rachel McAdams in the same year. "It was only one date, but before that, the closest I got to a celebrity was when I stood next to that girl from Scrubs," Welker explains. "And that was just for a photo op at an O.J. McDuffie charity event."

When a reporter asks him to pinpoint the reason for the Dolphins' tremendous season, linebacker Channing Crowder grins and says, "When they nixed that rule about not allowing the cheerleaders to fraternize with the players."

Sports-talk shows such as ESPN's Around the Horn have been unequivocally touting Ricky Williams' return as the catalyst for the Dolphins' success. Bryant Gumbel put the running back's situation into perspective when he ended an episode of his HBO series Real Sports With Bryant Gumbel with a plea (see sidebar at right) for Williams to return to the NFL.

"And those T-Mobile commercials didn't hurt," sports agent Drew Rosenhaus says. "When they had him text-messaging from all over the world, each time in a different yoga position, that was my idea. I don't even represent Ricky, but I just threw that out to him. I believe it made America fall in love with him all over again."

Within this euphoric atmosphere, it's hard to get serious answers from the players. When a reporter from the St. Petersburg Times prematurely shouted, "Hey, Daunte Culpepper, you've just won the Super Bowl. Where are you going now?" he expected the standard "Disney World" response. But Culpepper just winked and said, "Lake Minnetonka."

Some critics have begun to claim the Dolphins are having too much fun. "I know quarterback Joey Harrington is a heck of a piano player," analyst Phil Simms says, "but having him start the game and perform the National Anthem with Billy Joel is crossing the line as far as I'm concerned."

"I've got two coaches this week: the Piano Man and the Sabinator," Harrington explains. "They're both control freaks. Don't print that."

All the craziness and hype surrounding the big game is great. But we have to remember that Sports Illustrated predicted not only that the Dolphins would be in the Super Bowl but also that the team would lose by a field goal.

When Saban, who has been showing up all over South Beach with Matthew McConaughey and partying as if the Dolphins have already clinched the championship, says, "Sports Illustrated's reign as the Nostradamus of jocks ends with them putting us in the game. We couldn't lose this battle even if we used Olindo Mare at quarterback. Hey, I just saw Danny Marino over at Mansion and asked him if he wanted to come out and play, just for yuks."

("One great quarter and I can get my passing record back from Favre," Marino stated in a faxed response.)

"Heck," Saban says, taking it a step further. "We couldn't lose this game even if we used whoever's still alive from that '72 team. And you can hold me to this: If we get into garbage time in the fourth, I'll send Nick Buoniconti and Bob Kuechenberg onto the field for a few plays."

"Let's go," Kooch says when he hears of Saban's offer.

But that's enough talk for now. We can continue looking back at the miracle season at the celebration, which Dolphins owner H. Wayne Huizenga promises will include a boat parade down the New River, similar to the ones the Florida Marlins held for their championship celebrations.

"I want to be in one of those big-ass cigarette boats smoking a cigar," Traylor says. "Hah, smoking a cigar on a cigarette boat. Too much."

Too much, indeed.

Go Dolphins!