From the South Florida Sun-Sentinel

Banging spaces

If you want to pull an all-nighter in your dorm that doesn't involve studying, avoid these decorating disasters.

August 22 2007

While most of the people you hook up with in college understand the limits of dorm-room décor — the institutional paint, furniture that might have been hip during the Reagan administration, your roommate — nothing kills the mood for sex quicker than those revealing glimpses of what a total goob you truly are. Sure, you can stash your porn and empty pizza boxes, but just try explaining that life-size Joey Fatone cutout. So in the interests of keeping student bodies, er, active, we offer the following dorm-room don'ts that, if followed, should turn your living quarters into (bow-chicka-bow-bow) loving quarters.

Guys

Zelda posters

Action figures

Jenna Jameson inflatable vagina pillows

Transformers bedsheets

Photos of your girlfriend "back home"

Pogs trophies

Power Rangers pajamas with matching bath set

Girls

More than two stuffed animals

Jenna Jameson inflatable vagina pillows

Photos of your real boyfriend

Anything with a unicorn

Your high school diploma in a frame

Everyone

Papasan chairs

Black-light anything

Lladro figurines

Mitt Romney campaign literature