Wait, Christmas is how many days away? When did that happen? Sorry, we’re late getting this to you, but, well, you know how it is. Behold, the absolutely final, last-minute South Florida procrastinator’s Christmas 2017 gift guide!
1. If your friend/family member missed comedian Chris Rock’s first South Florida standup performances in more than nine years in March, he’s bringing the Total Blackout Tour around one more time. Tickets for Rock’s Jan. 5 show at Hard Rock Live in Hollywood went on sale last weekend, but good seats remain (his two earlier Hard Rock Live performances were sell-outs). Tickets cost $180, $130, $105, $85 and $65 at MyHRL.com, Ticketmaster.com and by calling 800-745-3000.
2. Beer drinkers, rejoice! The pilgrimage to the Funky Buddha Brewery in Oakland Park for the annual beer festival to unveil its obsessed-over Maple Bacon Coffee Porter happens on Jan. 13. Advance tickets are highly recommended, and when you buy one, you also can pre-purchase four or 12 beers, just to make sure you get yours. Visit FunkyBuddhaBrewery.com.
3. Jam band fan in the house? Mike Gordon of Phish will be featuring music from his new album, “OGOGO,” during the 2018 Sunshine Music Festival at Mizner Park Amphitheater in Boca Raton on Jan. 14. Live Nation has a general-admission four-pack offer with each ticket $49.75, compared to the regular price of $64.95. Festival founders the Tedeschi Trucks Band, Medeski, Martin and Wood, Galactic, Hot Tuna and others also will perform. Visit SunshineMusicFestival.com.
4. Deeply personal essays from strong female artists about other strong female artists fill “Woman Walk the Line: How the Women in Country Music Changed Our Lives” (University of Texas Press), edited by Nashville author Holly Gleason, formerly of the St. Andrew’s School in Boca Raton and the University of Miami. From Rosanne Cash’s eulogy of June Carter Cash to a 17-year-old Taylor Swift musing on Brenda Lee and historian Holly George Warren on rockabilly icon Wanda Jackson, this is essential reading. Physical, hardcover books are desirable, but you can send the ebook version quickly as a gift for Nook, Kindle or iPad.
5. Not only did the Beach Boys’ “Pet Sounds” define the concept album and influence generations of pop performers, from the Beatles to Cage the Elephant, it’s just sublime music. Beach Boys founder Brian Wilson will bring its innovative songs, along with other fan favorites, to the Pompano Beach Amphitheatre on May 20 on the long-running tour titled Brian Wilson Presents Pet Sounds: The Final Performances. Tickets went on sale Thursday for $34.50-$85 (plus fees) at TheAmpPompano.org or AXS.com.
6. My 11-year-old daughter nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard that Jingle Ball 2017 star Charlie Puth was coming back to South Florida. Tickets, starting at $17, went on sale Friday to hear Puth do hits including “How Long,” “Attention,” “One Call Away” and “See You Again” at the Coral Sky Amphitheatre in West Palm Beach on Sept. 1. Visit LiveNation.com.