This is the weekend you’re stuck with out-of-town family (Did I say stuck? Blessed!) who want to be impressed by where you live. And then, there’s that whole holiday shopping thing rearing its green head. Here’s a collection of South Florida sights, sounds, sips and shopping opportunities that should satisfy all ages of Griswolds, and help keep your sanity intact.
The cultural paella that is South Florida will be on full display 3-6 p.m. Sunday during a free, interactive parade that celebrates the completion of the Faena District on Collins Avenue in mid-Miami Beach. The six-block zone of condominiums, luxury hotels and cultural spaces – including the Rem Koolhaas-designed Faena Forum, where Madonna will perform next weekend during Art Basel – will debut with a processional along Collins Avenue (between 32nd and 36th streets), involving hundreds of dancers, acrobats, musicians and artists. One highlight will come from the Havana-based collective Los Carpinteros, who will lead a backward conga line up Collins Avenue. The event’s musical director is former No Wave rocker Arto Lindsay, a longtime resident of Rio de Janeiro who has been putting on parades around the world for more than a decade. He says of parades: “They’re beautiful, and they can make you think …” Hit the link for more on the Faena District opening.
The Riverside Market in Fort Lauderdale will open at 10 p.m. Thanksgiving (beer only, kitchen closed) to get a jump on their version of Black Friday, when owner Julian Siegel officially unwraps the highly sought, black-souled Goose Island Bourbon County Stout at 12:01 a.m. Friday, the same time it’s released at the brewery in Chicago. Beginning at 7 a.m. Friday, across the street at Craft Beer Cartel, the Black Friday celebration will offer exotica such as Cigar City’s Marshall Zukhov, Oskar Blues’ Barrel Aged Ten Fidy and the Goose Island Bourbon County Stout. And Friday night, Bob Gordash and Corey Brysman, owners of Holy Mackerel Brewery (opening soon in Pompano Beach), host the Holy Mackerel Tap Attack back at Riverside Market. Info: Facebook.com/RiversideMarket. ... The Black Friday specials at Boynton Beach’s Due South Brewing will include all your favorites (yes, Mariana Trench), but also things like BOGOs on the brewery’s T-shirts from noon to 2 p.m., and from noon to 4 p.m. half-off Rolos (Due South’s Milk Stout and Caramel Cream Ale poured half and half). Info: Facebook.com/DueSouthBrewing. ... Copperpoint Brewing in Boynton Beach will start serving its Tomahawk Chop IPA two hours before the 8 p.m. Florida State-UF game Friday night. Gator fans, they will accept your money, too. Info: Facebook.com/CopperpointBrewingCo. ... Barrel of Monks Brewing in Boca Raton will offer its dark and spicy Father Christmas in nicely packaged gift sets (two, three or six bottles) in the tasting room Friday only. Info: Facebook.com/BarrelOfMonks.
THE GIFT OF BEER
The perfect gift for that hard-to-satisfy beer drinker in the house? A ticket to Funky Buddha Brewery’s annual Maple Bacon Coffee Porter Festival in Oakland Park on Jan. 14 should do the trick. General-admission tickets go on sale 10 a.m. Friday at $55 each (plus tax), which gives you unlimited samples of more than 100 beers and guaranteed access to buy bottles of the coveted MBCP. Tickets went on sale earlier this week for four-bottle tickets ($115, which gets you a MBCP four-pack) and the one-case ticket ($235, for 12 bottles). Info: FunkyBuddhaBrewery.com.
Prolific actor and comedy king Cedric the Entertainer returns to the standup stage with four shows at the Palm Beach Improv 8:30 p.m. Friday, 7 and 9:30 p.m. Saturday and 7 p.m. Sunday. Tickets: $42.50 (two-drink minimum). Info: PalmBeach.Improv.com.
Aces High Tattoos will gather a clutch of area bands at Respectable Street in West Palm Beach Saturday night for the Aces High Music Festival, with performances by Everymen, Que Lastima, Spred the Dub, Lavola, Salute, Old Habits, Out of Sorts, Murder Suicide and Hillside Spirit Revival. Music starts at 8 p.m. Info: Facebook.com/RespectableStreet.
THOSE BROWARD KIDS
Local favorites Kids will dish out samples of their organic Americana Saturday night at the Culture Room in Fort Lauderdale, joined by Hoyle, Alex Di Leo and Love, Abbey, all for a wallet-friendly $8 (21 and younger $10). The all-ages concert begins at 7 p.m. Info: Facebook.com/TheBandKids, CultureRoom.net.
The fifth annual installment of the A Day at the Beach Concert Series returns to the North Beach Bandshell in North Miami Beach 5 p.m. Saturday with a diverse list of some of the best music makers in these parts, including Aaron Lebos (5:45 p.m.), Birdman’s Clambake (7 p.m.), Elastic Bond (8 p.m.) and Nil Lara (9:30 p.m.), with DJ Ephinko spinning between sets. Admission: $5 at the gate. The show includes live art by local painter Amos, food and crafts for sale, and a full bar. Info: CommunityArtsAndCulture.org.
LOCAL JAZZ LION
The Melton Mustafa Orchestra, led by the great local trumpeter and educator who played with everyone from the Count Basie Orchestra and the Duke Ellington Orchestra to Jaco Pastorius, plays a free show 8 p.m. Friday at the Museum of Contemporary Art in North Miami. Info: MoCaNoMi.org.
Area art house theaters book films with local tastes in mind. Nudity, strong sexual dialogue and sexual situations helped “Kiki, Love to Love,” from Spain, win over audiences at the just-concluded Fort Lauderdale International Film Festival. So it’s getting a week-long run at Cinema Paradiso Hollywood beginning Friday. No one under 17 admitted. Also opening on Friday at its sister theater in Fort Lauderdale, Savor Cinema, is "Christine," a biopic about Christine Chubbuck, a Sarasota TV reporter who killed herself on the air 1974. Info: FLIFF.com. The Stonzek Theatre at the Lake Worth Playhouse on Friday begins screening the intriguing documentary “Peter and the Farm,” about an aging, solitary, suicidal Vermont farmer. “Wondrous,” in the view of the New York Times’ Stephen Holden. Info: LakeWorthPlayhouse.org.
PURE SOUTH FLORIDA
Need a place to eat that will knock the socks off your out-of-town guests? Here’s my favorite spot, one I swore I would never reveal: Pelican Landing behind Pier 66 on Fort Lauderdale’s 17th Street Causeway. Casual deck dining, with fine food and drinks, complimentary parking and a truly stunning view of downtown and whatever super yachts happen to be parked nearby. My gift to you. Info: Pier66.Hyatt.com.
The small creative businesses of downtown Fort Lauderdale will gather Saturday night to show off their products during the Flagler Village Art Walk. Food trucks, live music, DJs, drinks, art, people-watching, head-scratching … All very laidback. Info: FatVillage.com.
DECKING THE TREES
The Flagler Village design firm Cadence Living is getting serious about its whimsical Yarn Bombing tradition (it’s the fifth annual) on the trees in front of its Andrews Avenue office 4-11 p.m. Saturday. This year, along with the holiday tunes, treats and beverages (yes, that kind), there’s a contest with prizes (categories: most creative, most holiday spirit), judged by artist Kiki Valdes. The entry fee is $20, which gets you a tree, five skeins of holiday-colored yarn, the aforementioned refreshments and signage recognition. It’s free to hang out and sing. Info: Facebook.com/CadenceLiving.
Pérez Art Museum Miami will celebrate Small Business Saturday at a meet-and-greet with local creatives offering unique works at the PAMM Shop, among them graffiti artist AHOLSNIFFSGLUE, whose line of AHOL JEWELRY incorporates his iconic insignia in pieces created with a 3D printer. Other artists at the museum between 3 and 5:30 p.m. include AMLgMATD, Dafné Alleno, Werner Blumenthal and Michelle Weinberg. Info: PAMM.org.
AN INDIE SPREE
Your South Florida-flavored shopping spree really isn’t complete until Indie Craft Bazaar’s Holiday Art and Handmade Festival. Because all your relatives need more quirk in their lives. And you need a $3 mimosa. The gathering is at the Revolution Live-Stache-America’s Backyard complex in downtown Fort Lauderdale noon-5 p.m. Dec. 3, again presenting its famous array of more than five dozen artists, crafters, designers, and stuff makers, as well as food trucks, drink specials and giveaways. Info: Facebook.com/IndieCraftBazaar.
TAKE THE KIDS
Friday is opening night for the annual Polar Express train rides at the Gold Coast Railroad Museum (12450 SW 152nd St., Miami), a fully functioning rail line with a diverse collection of cars, from Long Island Railroad relics to the Ferdinand Magellan Presidential Railcar, a National Historic Landmark. Definitely unique. The seasonal train rides include a 45-minute, holiday-themed journey to the “North Pole” set to the sounds of the soundtrack of the “Polar Express” film. During the trip, hot chocolate and treats will be served as passengers read along with the children’s book of the same name. Amid Christmas carols, Santa and helpers will hand each child the first gift of Christmas, a silver sleigh bell. Tickets: $35, $69 (first class), kids younger than 2 free. Info: GCRM.org.