Some folks will get in the holiday spirit this weekend at the Seminole Hard Rock Winterfest Boat Parade and some will do it with Dave Chappelle, who once seemed as likely to do a four-show run at the Fillmore as the real, actual Santa.
Chappelle does have a stand-up riff on Santa, in which he said he wasn’t ready for a black Santa: “Man, that s--- would suck. We wouldn’t get our presents until, like, the 28th, the 29th,” he said, then going on to blame the delay on a sordid night in Vegas.
As this was being written there were still tickets available to Chappelle’s fourth performance, a midnight Saturday show added after the first three set for Friday and Saturday nights sold out. Reserved-seat tickets are $55 at LiveNation.com, at 800-745-3000 and at the Fillmore box office, 1700 Washington Ave. Info: 305-673-7300, FillmoreMB.com.
In the event the last Chappelle tickets have been sold, here are more ways to get that warm, fuzzy holiday feeling in the next few days and weeks:
CAP ON HEAD, CHERRY NOSE
SantaCon 2013, the irreverent and boozy annual cavalcade of the Santa-clad and their fashionable elves, is set to take over downtown West Palm Beach on Saturday (first meet-up at Brewzzi at CityPlace at 3 p.m.) and Fort Lauderdale on Dec. 21 (beginning at Mangos at 6 p.m.). There will likely be a fundraising component, so get the latest information on what to bring at SantaCon.info. Here's how gloriously blurry a pack of Santas can get:
BEER AND S'MORES
The City of Lake Worth will light up the season Friday night with live music from Panic Disorder, a wine and beer garden, and two beach bonfires, one set aside for young ones to roast marshmallows. The Seaside Celebration runs from 6 to 9 p.m. at the Lake Worth Beach Complex (10 S. Ocean Blvd.). Admission is free. Info: LakeWorth.org/Events.
HELLO, NAUGHTY ELF
Grille 401 on Las Olas is serving insanity in a glass called the Naughty Elf. The cocktail combines an ounce of RumChata (cream, Caribbean rum and cinnamon) and two ounces of Smirnoff cinnamon-sugar vodka in a chilled martini glass with a graham cracker-chocolate rim. To make matters worse, the Naughty Elf is two for one from 4 to 7 p.m. Monday-Friday. Info: 954-767-0222, Grille401.com.
Thousands of South Florida Jewish singles ages 21-49 will again gather at the three MatzoBall parties in Palm Beach, Broward and Miami Dade counties on Dec. 24. Sponsored by the Society of Young Jewish Professionals and JDate, the high-energy parties will take place at Liv at the Fontainebleau ($50), Pangaea and Gryphon at the Hard Rock in Hollywood ($30), and at Il Bacio in Delray Beach ($30). These MatzoBalls are among 14 happening that night from New York to Los Angeles. Info: MatzoBall.org.
THE LAND OF 10,000 LATKES
If there were a best-name contest for a holiday party, this vote goes to The Tribe’s eighth annual Hanukkah party, Vodka Latke. Taking place Thursday, Dec. 19, at the Wynwood hotspot LMNT (55 NW 36th St.), the gathering for 22 to 45-year-olds is from 8-11 p.m. and includes a Ketel-sponsored open bar (free Perrier, too), 10,000 latkes and sounds by DJ Crespo. Tickets: $25 advance, $40 at the door. It benefits Florida's Children's Home Society. Info: bit.ly/vodkalatke13.
THE PERFECT GIFT?
The first set of early-bird tickets went like that for the second annual Tortuga Music Festival April 12-13 on Fort Lauderdale beach. But a new allotment goes on sale Friday at 10 a.m., beginning at $155 for a weekend pass. The lineup includes Luke Bryan, Eric Church, Sheryl Crow and Ziggy Marley. Hit the link for the rest of the performers and Tortuga ticket information.
“The Nutcracker” is always a tough ticket this time of year, but at 10 a.m. every Saturday this month the Classic Gateway Theater (1820 E. Broward Blvd., Fort Lauderdale) is offering a traditional production filmed in 2011 at the historic Mariinsky Theatre in St. Petersburg, Russia, where the original “Nutcracker” was first performed more than 120 years ago. Tickets: $8. Info: 954-763-7994, ClassicGateway.com.
OK, right now, right this very minute, there are tickets available for Tuesday’s candle-lit performance of Seraphic Fire’s “Angels We Have Heard On High” at Sunshine Cathedral in Fort Lauderdale, as well as the ensemble’s three performances of “Handel’s Messiah” in Boca Raton on Dec. 20, in Coral Gables Dec. 21 and Fort Lauderdale Dec. 22. Do not delay! Info: 305-285-9060, SeraphicFire.org. Here's Seraphic Fire director Patrick Quigley explaining his passion for "Handel's Messiah" before last year's performances:
“Christmas Eve in the City: A Service of Lessons & Carols” is the name of a unique night of classic Christmas songs and hymns organized by CityChurch on Dec. 24 in Fort Lauderdale's FAT Village at 517 NW 1st Ave. The nondenominational, multi-congregation 6 p.m. service will begin with a 5:30 p.m. pre-service concert from musicians on the local scene, including Josh Diaz from Kids, Corey Bost and Dan Diaz from Civilian. CityChurch, led by Rev. Brad Schmidt and located next to the evolving Flagler Village Community Garden, has been involved with many FAT Village events, including the garden, Better Block Fort Lauderdale and Revel on the Block. Info: CityChurchSFL.com.
A PARTY IN YOUR PAJAMAS
Light Up Downtown Boca festivities take a chilly turn with a free pajama-night screening of “Polar Express” on Dec. 20 in Mizner Park. Kids are invited to wear pajamas for train rides in the “snow,” along with face-painting and holiday hair-braiding from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m., when the movie begins. Hot chocolate, popcorn, pizza and beverages will be available for purchase, and blankets and chairs are welcome (or rent a chair for $5). Info: MiznerAmphitheater.com. Other places to see free holiday movies include “Elf,” at 7 p.m. Friday at the Villages of Hillsboro Park (4111 NW Sixth St., Deerfield Beach; 954-480-4495), and “Jingle All the Way” on Friday at the ArtsPark in Hollywood (VisitHollywoodFL.org).
A SLICE OF COLBIE
OK, you knew, but I didn’t. When did Colbie Caillat get added to Saturday’s No Snow Ball show? I missed her on “Dancing With the Stars” the other week, but still love that “Brighter Than the Sun,” and she’s apparently got a new album coming out any month now. The rest of the No Snow Ball lineup at Boca Raton's Mizner Park is Goo Goo Dolls, Fray, Five for Fighting, Parachute and multitalented young ZZ Ward. Tickets: $40-$100. Info: 561-393-7807, FrontGateTickets.com.
Retro Rodeo, from the crafty folks at Indie Craft Bazaar, takes over Bergeron Rodeo arena in Davie Saturday and Sunday with range of vintage and one-of-a-kind items (admission $3, $5 for two days), but they’ve also announced the return of ICB to Revolution Live in downtown Fort Lauderdale on Dec. 21. Procrastinators of the world can unite from noon to 7 p.m. for shopping with more than 70 vendors, drink specials and live music from The Bows and Ties. Admission: $5. Info: 954-785-7475, CityWideMarket.com.
LITTLE DRUMMER GIRLS
That rum-pa-pum-pum-ing you hear on Saturday may be “The Little Drummer Boy,” but it also may be the inaugural free family-day event at the Pérez Art Museum Miami. The long-winded PAMM Free Second Saturdays Presented by Target will be a monthly event from 1-4 p.m. at the just-opened museum (1103 Biscayne Blvd., Miami). Each hour, on the hour, 12 female drummers (from Miami and New York City) will fill PAMM with beats in a work composed by Mindy Abovitz, founder and publisher of Tom Tom Magazine, the only publication dedicated to female drummers. Who knew? Info: 305-375-3000, PAMM.org.
The seventh annual Christmas Near the Beach from 4 to 9 p.m. Saturday at the ArtsPark in Hollywood offers a free smorgasbord of the season with bluegrass bands, gospel singers, excerpts from “The Nutcracker” and photos with St. Nick in his “beach house.” Info: ChristmasNearTheBeach.com.
At the Jingle Ball in New York last Friday you may have seen Miley Cyrus twerking with Santa. But, kids, we have it on good authority that it was not the real Santa, but one of his helpers, like you see at the mall. So we are sort of interested to see what transpires when the Y100 Jingle Ball hits the BB&T Center in Sunrise on Dec. 20, where Miley will be joined by twerking partner Robin Thicke, Fall Out Boy, Flo Rida, Boca Raton ex Ariana Grande, Austin Mahone, Demi Lovato, DJ Armin Van Buuren, Enrique Iglesias and Avril Lavigne. Tickets are $86-$266 at Ticketmaster.com.