FloriDUH's Sexapalooza 2012: Tales of sex gone bad

Floridians have been called every name.

Crazy. Crackers. Loco. Too stupid to vote correctly. Blue hairs. Rednecks. Carpetbaggers. Half-baked. In the sun too long.

They say we live in a Banana Republic.

Call us anything you'd like.

However, never ever call us sexually unadventurous.

Even our Governor.

Governor Rick Scott gave out the state’s information hot line for a deadly meningitis outbreak last October.

It turned out to be a hot hot hotline: Scott was one digit off, providing the state's citizen's an opportunity to hear the low purr of a woman’s voice offering to talk dirty.

We often go where no man -- or woman -- goes, sexually speaking.

Don't believe this?

Well, just consider FloriDUH 's Sexapalooza 2012 top picks of sex gone south.

Driving Florida's highways are never boring, despite the flat landscape and endless billboards. But, if your traveling with kids in the car, better take along a pair of blinders.

• Ocala: Woman wearing only pink shirt accused of performing sex and exposing herself to motorists before giving arresting officer “love tap”
• Pompano Beach: Woman accused of exposing her entire body at street intersection

Talk about distracted drivers ...guess sexting and texting while driving are the least of our worries.

• This beats everything. Drummer accused of masturbating while driving on I-95 near Ormond Beach.
• Havoc on the highway in Hobe Sound: DUI driver with sex toy in his rump rear-ends another driver.
• Jeepers creepers! Naked man allegedly caught masturbating with toy pistol in anus while driving his Jeep in Fort Pierce
• Crash in Port Charlotte! Woman pulled gun on man in moving car -- while having sex, deputies say

Folks in orgies really got into the swing of things in 2012. Too bad we don't have group holding cells just for them.

• Zephyrhills: Threesome sex romp ended in gunfire, deputies say
• Spring Hill: Naked, jealous swingers duke it out at orgy, deputies say.
• Vero Beach: Wife enraged at hubby's request to 'use the bed' -- with another woman. This couple was married only 5-months.

Floridians insist the best of everything, including sex. Or there could be a price to pay.