Birthday Party Politics: SouthFlorida.com

Between deciding who's invited -- or who isn't -- where to have it and how elaborate, birthday parties can turn into a sticky affair

Now that my child has started his school career, birthday parties abound. It was simple before this -- simple and fun. Theoretically, birthday parties are supposed to be wonderful. Unfortunately, the whole idea of throwing a birthday party makes me break into a sweat. From topping the Joneses to inviting the Joneses, I have known birthday parties to be the source of endless drama.
It started the first week of school. Every child in my son's class was invited to Chuck E. Cheese. Even better -- every child was invited to Chuck E. Cheese on a Saturday afternoon. This mayhem was to be the first of many "invite the whole class" affairs that my son and I would encounter throughout the year. In fact, on a recent Saturday, we attended three birthday parties in one day. By Sunday, I was exhausted.
But aside from the physical exhaustion of the partying itself, I've had to factor in the mental enervation that comes with birthday party politics. When my son and I started to discuss his impending birthday, I slammed on the brakes. My son had been envisioning a grand affair at Pump It Up, Chuck E. Cheese or Playmobil Fun Park with his entire class. With the number of kids he was tossing around, this was an expensive vision.
I really didn't know any of the parents from my son's class, so basically we were looking at spending $500 on a day with a bunch of strangers. Hey, I did carry the child in my womb for nine months, so it was supposed to be a day for me to celebrate, too, right? When I was young, we didn't invite the whole class to the party -- we brought the party to the class in the form of cupcakes. What happened to that option?
But my issues with birthday parties don't end there. I also have to consider the creativity factor. For example, we recently attended a Dora-themed birthday party. The highlight was a scavenger hunt, wherein the children were given handmade Dora and Diego backpacks filled with take-home goodies and maps. The adults were then enlisted to play various characters and lead the children through a series of activities. Everyone ended in "Tico's Nutty Forest," which consisted of a tree adorned with Nutter Butters and a pi�ata. The kids went wild.
I think my mouth was open in awe the entire time -- except when I was eating from the extensive and appropriately themed Mexican food buffet. The party was truly a creative masterpiece.
So what's a simple girl like me to do? Whereas some top the charts as far as money spent and number of children invited, other moms are creative geniuses, able to make a small budget go a long way. Now, far be it from me to call myself a creative genius, but with that in mind, I put together some suggestions to help parents keep their sanity, grocery money and possibly their pride intact when planning their next party:

Keep it simple. That's all I have to say on that.
Use the Internet and friends to help you get creative. If you are having trouble producing creative ideas for your child's party, never fear. Plant a seed with your friends and see if they can come up with some helpful ideas. Or try typing in a few keywords on the Internet. Then sit back and let the magic of technology take control.
Invite the right mix of people. If David and Zoey invited your child to their birthday, does that mean you need to invite them? What if they are children that your child doesn't like? The issue of whom to invite and how not to hurt anyone's feelings seems to be the pinnacle of birthday party politics. If you can afford it and it will make you and your child happy, what the heck -- invite them all! Personally, I prefer to keep my parties intimate. But that's just me; you have to figure out what's right for you and your child.
Predetermine your budget and stick to it. We are all guilty of overspending at times, some more than others (you know who you are).
Get out of town. Visit some relatives or go on vacation for your child's birthday. You'll often spend as much on a few days of vacationing as you would on a party. The only trouble with this plan is that you have to convince the birthday child that going away is what he or she wants. Last year, this was the tactic I chose when faced with a massive, invite-the-whole-class affair. I decided to show my son the Star Wars ride at Disney online. Once he saw what he could be enjoying for his birthday, he was onboard -- no politics.

Perhaps most importantly, don't lose sight of the primary intention -- to celebrate. If you can't afford to invite everyone, one up the Joneses or get out of town, then simply make your child's birthday special however you can. Take your family out to your child's favorite ice cream store, invite a friend or two for a sleepover, or do something out of the ordinary. It doesn't need to cost a lot of money or be a larger-than-life event. It just needs to be acknowledged for what it is: a special day.